WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN...AND GRANDCHILDREN

WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN  (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)

To those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own,
grandchildren,
nieces,
nephews,
or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend
to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth,
God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was
"DON'T ! "

"Don't what ? "
Adam replied.
 
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit."
God said.
"Forbidden fruit ?
We have forbidden fruit ?
Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit ! "
No Way ! "


"Yes way ! "
"Do NOT eat the fruit ! "
said God.


"Why ? "

  "Because I am your Father and I said so ! "

God replied,
wondering why He hadn't stopped
creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later,
God saw His children having an apple break
and He was ticked !

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit ? "
God asked.


"Uh huh,"
Adam replied.
"Then why did you ? "
said the Father.

"I don't know,"
said Eve.

"She started it ! "
Adam said.
"Did not ! "
"Did too ! "

"DID NOT ! "
Having had it with the two of them,
God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own.

Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY !

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,
don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children,
what makes you think it would be
a piece of cake for you ?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !

1. You spend the first two years of their life
teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend
the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

  2. Grandchildren are God's reward
for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why
some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you.

In fact,
they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own.  (I love this one!  Barbara)

6. We childproofed our homes,
but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY:

Be nice to your kids.
They will choose your
nursing home one day.
AND FI N ALLY:
IF YOU ! HAVE A LOT OF TENSION
AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS
ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:






"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN"
AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!

SOMEONE ELSES GRANDCHILD

I was in Sam's club today.

I went to the rest room behind a grand mother and her grand daughter who looked about 4 years old.

They were in the next stall and I heard the little girl say,

Maw Maw, do you have a biginia

Maw Maw answered yes.

Then the little girl began to sing at the top of her lungs........

Maw Maw has a Biginia, Maw maw  has a Biginia.

The grand mother was trying to get her to stop singing because everyone in the rest room was laughing.

She continued to sing even louder.

I left as did everyone else but I guess Maw Maw stayed in the stall because I never saw her come out of the rest room and she was nowhere to be seen in Sam's club!

Bama   aka  Mary Louise

WHO TO MARRY...WRITTEN BY CHILDREN

 How to decide who to marry - Written by kids......

 

SCROLL DOWN

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?

 

1. You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you

like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep

the chips and dip coming. -- Alan, age 10

 

2. No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to

marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later

who you're stuck with. -- Kristen, age 10

 

 

 

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

 

1. Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. -- Camille, age 10

 

2. No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get

married. -- Freddie, age 6

 

 

 

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

 

1. You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling

at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8

 

 

 

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

 

1. Both don't want any more kids. -- Lori, age 8

 

 

 

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

 

1. Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know

each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long

enough. --

Lynnette, age 8

 

2. On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually

gets them interested enough to go for a second date. -- Martin, age

10

 

 

 

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

 

1. I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the

newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.

--

Craig, age 9

 

 

 

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

 

1. When they're rich. -- Pam, age 7

 

2. The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess

with that - - Curt, age 7

 

3. The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry

them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. -- Howard,

age 8

 

 

 

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

 

1. It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need

someone to clean up after them. -- Anita, age 9

 

 

 

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

 

1. There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? --

Kelvin, age 8

 

 

 

And the #1 Favorite is........

 

 

 

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

 

1. Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a

truck. -- Ricky, age 10

 

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

Four of my grandchildren came by yesterday with my daughter and son in law.

We all went out to dinner and when we got back home, the children each gave me a hand made card.

Instead of Happy Mother's Day, Caleb's card said...

Happy Bama Day!

Bama aka Mary Louise

BIRTH ORDER

I am a middle child. I have always felt that it was a great place to grow up. I was the baby to the oldest two and the boss to the youngest two!  

Bama  aka  Mary Louise

 

Here's a look at what impact your birth-order may have on you:

First Borns:
More conscientious, ambitious and aggressive than their younger siblings, first borns are over-represented at Harvard and Yale as well as disciplines requiring higher education such as medicine, engineering or law. Every astronaut to go into space has been either the oldest child in his or her family or the eldest boy. And throughout history -- even when large families were the norm -- more than half of all Nobel Prize winners and U.S. presidents have been birst born. Famous eldest children include: Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton, Richard Branson, J.K. Rowling and Winston Churchill. And macho movie stars are First Born, too, including Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and all the actors who have played James Bond.

Middles:
Middle children are more easy going and peer-oriented. Since they can get lost in the shuffle of their own families, they learn to build bridges to other sources of support and therefore tend to have excellent people skills. Middle children often take on the role of mediator and peacemaker. Famous middle children include: Bill Gates, J.F.K., Madonna and Princess Diana.

Youngest:
The youngest child tends to be the most creative and can be very charming -- even manipulative. Because they often identify with the underdog, they tend to champion egalitarian causes. (Youngest siblings were the earliest backers of the Protestant Reformation and the Enlightenment.) Successful in journalism, advertising, sales and the arts, famous youngest children include Cameron Diaz, Jim Carrey, Drew Carey, Rosie O'Donnell, Eddie Murphy and Billy Crystal.

Only Children:
Only children have similar characteristics to first borns and are frequently burdened with high parental expectations. Research shows they are more confident, articulate and likely to use their imagination than other children. They also expect a lot from others, hate criticism, can be inflexible and are likely to be perfectionists. Well-known only children include Rudy Guiliani, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Alan Greenspan, Tiger Woods, tennis' teen queen Maria Sharapova and Leonardo Da Vinci.

Twins:
Because they hold equal status and are treated so similarly, twins turn out similarly in most cases. Consider advice columnists "Dear Abby" and "Ann Landers" (Abigail and Esther Friedman), and Harold and Bernard Shapiro, who became presidents of Princeton University and Canada's McGill University respectively.

Dr. Frank Sulloway, a behavioral scientist and visiting professor at the Institute of Personality and Social Research at University of California, Berkeley and author of the book, "Born To Rebel: Birth Order, Family Dynamics and Creative Lives," says first borns are more similar in personality to first borns in other families than they are to their own younger siblings and that youngest children are often more similar to the youngest child in another family than his or her own elder siblings. He says this is because the family is not as much a "shared environment" as a set of niches that provide siblings with different outlooks.

Conley agrees, but stresses that these are just general trends -- and that the whole birth-order theory can be turned on its head depending on the child's personality, the age gap between siblings and the family circumstances each child experiences during his or her formative years.

PAUL HARVEY WRITES

Paul Harvey Writes:

 

 

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better.

 

I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.

 

 

I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.

 

I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.

 

And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.

 

 

It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.

 

 

I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.

 

 

I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room,but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.

 

 

When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her.

 

I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

 

 

On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.

 

 

If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.

 

I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.

 

 

When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.

 

 

I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.

 

 

May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

 

 

I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.

 

 

I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.

 

 

May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.

 

 

I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Hannukah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.

 

 

These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.
 

Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss. I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

FEELING GREAT

THE REALLY GREAT PERSON IS THE ONE WHO MAKES EVERYONE  FEEL GREAT!   G. K. Chesterson

My Children and Grand-children make me feel great.

They think that I know everything or can figure it out.

Their hugs are warm and genuine.

They make me feel great and very special.

Bama  aka Mary Louise and Mom